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Beliefs | Heidi Smith Luedtke
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Category Archives: Beliefs

10 Things I Know Right Now

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on November 16, 2012
Categories: Beliefs, Books, Detachment Parenting, Emotion, Parenting, self-awareness

My latest article, entitled “little know-it-alls,” came out yesterday in the December issue of Parents magazine. The idea for this piece came from a real-life Mommy moment, when I questioned my son Carson’s discovery of a “shark pod” on the Jersey Shore. If you read the article – go ahead and click over there, I’ll… [read more]

Why We Should Tell Kids Learning is Difficult

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on October 19, 2012
Categories: Beliefs, Education, Motivation, Psychology Research, Self-confidence

Every parent wants to boost their child’s sense of optimism and self-confidence. But statements like “You’re so smart!” or “These problems are easy” might inadvertently undermine kids’ academic achievement. That’s because these phrases send the message that ability is fixed (you either have it or you don’t) and success should be effortless. A recent study… [read more]

Rewrite your Story

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on September 5, 2012
Categories: Beliefs, Cognitive Psychology, Emotion, Self-development

Some life events are so overwhelming that we simply get lost in a sea of emotions. A person who is fired from her job after years of positive performance reviews may feel angry, resentful and betrayed by her former supervisor. She may believe she was targeted by colleagues who were threatened by her abilities or… [read more]

See Your Self-Portrait

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on April 10, 2012
Categories: Beliefs, Personality, Self and identity, Self-development

If you painted a self-portrait, how would it look? Would you have tired eyes? An alluring smile? Too much junk in the trunk? Would you look fearful or brave? Lonely or eager? Frazzled or calm? Content or frustrated? Sad or satisfied? Happy? Excited? Overjoyed? Would your arms be open and relaxed, or crossed in front… [read more]

Talk Yourself Out of Social Insecurities

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on September 9, 2011
Categories: Beliefs, Emotion, Happiness 101, People Skills, Psychology Research, Relationships, Self and identity, Self-development

Everyone has some social insecurity. Jitters. Self-consciousness. Cold feet. Apprehension. “What does she think of me?” “I bet he won’t call.” “Do I look like a fool?” Our anxious thoughts swirl out of control, threatening to carry us out to sea where we’ll drown in our own self-defeating behavior. The script goes something like this:… [read more]

Getting your Child to Sleep through the Night (or, “Psychologist, Change Thyself”)

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on September 6, 2011
Categories: Beliefs, Motivation, Parenting, Uncategorized

Perhaps you’ve heard the classic joke: “How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?” Answer: “Only one, but the light bulb has to really *want* to change. Today I’m checking in with some recent “light bulb moments.” You know, the a-ha moments when something you should have known all along hits you… [read more]

Let Little Successes Count

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on August 18, 2011
Categories: Beliefs, Cognitive Psychology, Goals, Health Research, Motivation, Self-development, Thinner Thursday

For this week’s #ThinnerThursday post, I had planned to write up some tips for maximizing the benefits of diary-keeping, but I’ve decided to put that off a week, because I think you need to see this: 15 minutes of exercise a day can extend life by three years. Super-quick summary: A new study published Tuesday… [read more]

Tolerance is a Choice

By Heidi Smith Luedtke on July 11, 2011
Categories: Beliefs, Cognitive Psychology, People Skills, Psychology Research, Relationships

If you’re concerned that your kids, friends or coworkers see the world in black and white and you’d like to encourage more open-minded attitudes, new research suggests a personal approach. While you don’t want to condone racist speech or behavior, an authoritative response may backfire, according to a study by researchers at the University of… [read more]

Do you wish you were a calm, cool and kid-focused parent? Now you can be.
What People Are Saying

Detachment Parenting is a terrific, go-to guide for those difficult moments in parenting. Dr. Luedtke's warm voice and user-friendly format make this book a pleasure to read. ---Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of The Dance of Anger and Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and the Coupled Up.
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Detachment Parenting is an excellent guide for busy parents. Broken down into easy-to-navigate sections, Heidi provides solutions to everyday problems that can help you step back, compose yourself, communicate more effectively and find peaceful solutions with your children in even the most difficult moments. As a mother of 3, I found this book to be practical, relevant and encouraging. My favorite tip is #27, Make Me Time and Space. Read it and find your favorite tip too. You’ll be glad you did! —April O’Leary, Life Coach, Author and Founder of UofMoms.com

Finally, a parenting e-book that tells us what to do and how to do it! As a parent…you are your child’s coping instructor. Unfortunately, when children spin out of control, parents often become reactive as opposed to proactive. Detachment Parenting gives parents concrete and creative strategies on how to respond in a productive, teaching way. This easy-to-use book is a must have for all who are faced with the most demanding profession on the planet…PARENTING! — Julia Cook, M.S., National Award Winning Children’s Author/Parenting Expert

As the mother of a 2-year-old, and a self-described “attachment parenting mom,” I found Heidi Luedke’s book, Detachment Parenting, to be an excellent source of realistic strategies to help me be the mom I want to be. The book easy to read and full of practical ideas I will use in my everyday life. For example, Detachment Parenting taught me what to do when I feel myself getting upset, and how to interact with my son when he is upset (including how to really listen to him and help him understand, label, and work through his feelings). This is a book I will come back to again and again! —Colleen Ament Rasey, mom of one very busy toddler

Psychologist and mom Heidi Luedtke has created an essential primer for parents of young kids. In this highly readable, to-the-point book, she helps parents learn to step out of frustrating meltdown-minefields by avoiding toxic emotional contagion, guiding kids toward emotion regulation, and building stronger, happier parent-child bonds. Each of her 33 tactics is thoroughly, expertly explained and easy to implement. You’ll wish you read it sooner! —Malia Jacobson, health journalist, mom of two, and author of Ready, Set, Sleep

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