The Parenting Time Warp: Counting the Days Until My Half-Birthday

As I made the rounds tick-or-treating with my kids last night, I was reminded of how different their time perspective is from mine. Neighbors asked each child “How old are you?” and both replied with precision: Scooby proudly said “Two and a half!” and her knight-in-shining armor added “And I’m five and a half!”

No one asked me how old I am (thank goodness). As I celebrated my birthday earlier this week, I confronted this fact: The days pass very slowly at this stage of my life, but the years are flying by faster and faster. Maybe I should start celebrating half-birthdays after all!

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Of course everyone tells you to savor each moment with your children because they grow up so fast. And it’s true. In the blink of an eye, the sesame-seed-sized baby-to-be grows into an avocado and then a cantaloupe. I don’t know who decided to create a fruit-based prenatal timeline, but it’s a genius idea.

Babies crawl, then walk, and run before you can blink. They babble, then talk, and talk-back way too soon (and way too often!). Holidays come and go in a flurry of excitement as Halloween gives way to Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year. Valentine’s Day, spring break and summer vacation are right around the corner, really. From the moment you become a mom, you enter a strange sort of parenting time warp where days last longer than weeks.

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Looking at my online calendar, I notice I’ll celebrate my half birthday while the kids are on Spring Break. I’ll be 43 and a half on March 30th. But first, I have to cook 540 meals, wash 180 loads of dishes, and fluff and fold 156 loads of laundry. That should make the time fly by. Right?